Been experiencing some dryness down there that’s stopping your enjoyment of the act? Need a helping hand to keep things moving smoothly? Lady Friday has all your questions answered about THAT aisle in the pharmacy…
The sheer variety of lubricants on the market today can be a bit overwhelming. There are flavours, warming and cooling varieties, organic ones and all shapes and sizes.
Figuring out what’s good for you and your partner may take some trial and error, but luckily you’ve got this beside you to help you out.
Water-based lubricant
This is the most widely used lube of all, and it’s a huge seller. It’s water-soluble, so it won’t stain anything and can come off fairly immediately. It also won’t interfere with condoms or dams, and can play safely with sex toys.
The bad news? It’s absorbed really rapidly into membranes and tissues, so it’s great for quickies, but not so good for marathon sessions, where you’ll have to keep reaching for another dose. If you don’t like feeling like the Sahara in a drought year after about 20 minutes, you may need to go elsewhere…
Silicon-based lubricant
Silicon-based lube gets a bad rap because people get confused about the difference between silicon and oil. They know SOMETHING slippery breaks down the material in condoms – and silicon gets the blame, undeservedly.
Oils like petroleum jelly are dangerous to use with condoms because they erode the surface. That means absolutely no baby oils, massage oil, hand cream, lotion, machine oil or god knows what else you were thinking of using. Put it away.
Silicon, on the other hand? Perfectly good. It’s best for showers and other water-based activities, because unlike water-based lube it doesn’t come off easily in water. Plus it keeps going for ages, making it perfect for Tantric practitioners and those who like to count their orgasms on both hands.
It has its own problems. Silicon cannot go anywhere near silicon-based toys, because it damages them, so keep them entirely separate. It also sticks around for ages (you’ll need soap and water to get it off your body and a proper clean to remove it from sheets, as with any greasy substance).
Anal lubricant
Anal lube is exclusively for anal sex – and if you’re going that way, it’s the best option rather than an ordinary lube. It’s thicker than normal lube for some extra help in sensitive places, will last for a long time, and often contains ingredients that soothe.
It’s generally water-based, but don’t use it for normal sex, as the thickness may lessen sensation.
Flavoured lubricant
This is the one most of us regard with disbelief or frank puzzlement the first time we see it. Kiwi fruit flavour? Raspberry? Mojito? Why?
Flavoured lubes are designed for oral sex, so they’re really not a great investment if you’re not committed to that particular area of fun. They can be used on condoms, because they’re mostly water-based (but check the ingredients).
One downside: some people report feeling ill after such an over-exposure to a flavour, but that’s a personal thing. Also hunt down sugar and glycerin-free varieties, because they’re far better for the pH in your parts.
Fertility lubricant
This is important if you’re trying to conceive – even in totally unprotected sex, lubricants can interfere with sperm, lowering the chance of pregnancy.
There are a bunch of fertility-friendly lubes on the market that don’t make the sperm’s job even harder – it’s best to shop around, ask your gynaecologist and keep an eye on new research and varieties.
Organic lubricant
Contrary to assumption, organic lubricant does not mean lubricant made from kale, patchouli or fair-trade hemp. It’s just all-natural ingredients that are environmentally friendly.
Organic lube is best for the intensely green and also for those with very sensitive skin, because it’s incredibly gentle. It’s becoming a bigger deal, so look out for it to appear in your local pharmacy or sex shop.
Warming and cooling lubricant
This is for what’s called sensation play. Warmth and cold are often part of sexy fantasies, but if you aren’t particularly fond of the idea of candle wax or ice cubes on your nethers (neither is a good plan, by the way), lubricants exist to simulate the feeling and increase sensitivity.
Mixing the two also often creates intense sensation during sex, but be warned: you need to do a spot check with them before you get heavy, because some people react to tiny smears of them with the violence of a million bee stings, and end up spending their evenings with ice-packs instead of partners.
Lady Friday xx
Taking the pillow talk out of the bedroom, every Friday…
